Paying it Forward

A personal story for our What did we learn this week:

This past week I was at work doing my thing and this man came up to the bar. Immediately, I asked him what I could get for him and he replied with “I’m just waiting to pay, and how is your night going?” I then started to tell him about how dead it had been. He finished his transaction with his waitress and proceeded to walk away.

Almost immediately he returned and upon his return I noticed a $20 bill that he had slipped under my wine opener. I looked at him and said “Sir, you don’t have to do that!” he said “let me tell you this story” :

I was in Texas at my daughters graduation from a rehab center and I took her and about 30+ other people out to eat. The bill couldn’t of been cheap, I want to say around $1800 at least. I asked for the bill and the waitress told me that it had been taken care of, needless to say I was shocked! I found out that the man sitting in the booth alone on the other side of the restaurant had paid our bill. We were told that his daughter had also attended the same rehab that my daughter had. However, she was later killed by a drunk driver, and he came into this restaurant everyday and ate alone.

As chills ran across my body I kept my eyes locked with this mans while he finished his story. He said ever since that day every time he comes into this restaurant he likes to give something back in memory of what that nice stranger did for him. Paying it forward.

I was SO touched by this story, and he taught me a lesson too. That man gave me a $20 bill and I didn’t even serve him a drink.. just to do what he felt was right. Take a lesson from this story and pay it forward every now and then. Not only will it make you feel good it will make that person feel even better.

It’s the little things in life that make the biggest difference!

XO,

East Coast Betty

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Dear Candice

Oscar Wilde said it best – “To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance”

Dedicated to Candice

Think of a stream with water running through it with no current. Now, imagine yourself swimming upstream against the current you created. I am sure many of us can imagine creating our own problems. I was the problem. Some people are quick to blame others for their problems. I know today that the currents in my life are the ones I have created. I produced them for myself and for her. I loved her despite myself. She loved me anyway.

The majority of my drama has been of my own making. People sometimes aren’t aware of the drama that they are in because they’re too caught up in their own bullshit (current) to see it. I’m guilty of this and anyone who knows me and is reading this is most definitely nodding their head up and down in agreement.

The best part about people who are drama is that they just bitch bitch bitch about everything wondering why they have so much drama in their life. And WHINE. Whine about everything. OMG,  just stop, save the drama for your mama and look in the mirror. You are no longer that little stream with a few little currents; you’re more like the owner of an amusement park operating the wave pool. What’s funny is you think everything is about you and cry regularly because Jane Doe deleted you from Facebook. Why you consider this Jane Doe a BFF baffles me because you guys aren’t even friends in real life. Half the time you think people delete you from Facebook when they’ve actually just deactivated their account due to their own drama. Ha! Come on, you know you’ve done this at least once. We’ve all done it. Don’t try and deny the fact that you thought one of your Facebook “friends” deleted and blocked you when really; they simply deactivated their account. Time to get real. Lesbehonest.

In all seriousness, regarding love and life – I was missing a key ingredient…self-love. I think it’s hard for people to love someone else if they don’t fully love themselves. See, the stream is my life. The water is me. The current is what I manifested while swimming upstream against the natural flow of life. At times it felt like a monstrous and considerably greater current than it was. Currents don’t have to exist.

Throughout my life, some of the currents have often felt like an undertow one could experience in the ocean during high tide unable to return to shore. It is only as of late that I’m aware of the undertow that I’ve created for myself. Self-awareness is another key ingredient. Otherwise, you are living a recipe for disaster dumbfounded why your life is a hot mess. The water was intended to be pure. It is for the most part. I believe we are all pure at the core of our beings.

How did I come to understand all of this? Love. Pain. Loss. Heartbreak. She was my greatest love and my biggest teacher. Sure, some may consider it a revolving door relationship, but boy did we try. We tried long and hard. Underneath all of the bullshit, we loved one another so very deeply. She recently told me I couldn’t possibly love her. I did. Very much. I still do. I always will. I loved her as best as I was capable. I told her some time ago if things didn’t work out, she’d always be the one that got away.

Who knows what forever really means anyway? But maybe, just maybe, nothing lasts forever. Or, maybe it does and it’s supposed to last as long as the forever you’re supposed to have with someone until forever runs its course. She saw me, the real me, better than I saw myself, and she loved me despite the current. But she was drowning and I was pulling her down. I didn’t know how to swim. How could I support us both out there in high tide when she was the air I was breathing as I kept going under pulling her down with me?

She couldn’t be my life-jacket anymore. She had to let go. She did it for both of us. I broke our hearts. I can see that now in hindsight but boy does heartbreak suck. It bugs the shit out of me when I hear people say, “It will be ok. Time heals all wounds.” But it does. It’s true. My heart is healing. Slowly. I’m learning. What’s most important is allowing yourself the time to do so. Time to heal. She’s forced me to dig deep enough within myself to find the answers because that’s where the truth lies. That’s the lesson. She’s changed my life.

I will never forget her. In the beginning she told me I renewed her capacity for love. You want to know why she has been so instrumental in my life? I’ll tell ya. Maybe I did renew her capacity for love. She should know she renewed my capacity for love too, more than words can ever express.

The lesson here – love yourself first. No one can be your life-jacket. Everyone around us is our teacher. Look for the lessons in everyone and everything.

XO,

Jay

Vitameatavegamin

This isn’t quite like an I Love Lucy episode; we have found that taking vitamins daily is vital to your overall health. We aren’t getting any younger Betties, so we must prepare by taking care of our bodies now!

We chose our top categories and will list which vitamins you need to take to support that area in your life.

Beauty (A true betty takes pride in her looks)

Cognitive (to regain all of those lost brain cells from EDC & TAO over the years) There are many different vitamins in this category. We chose our two favorites.

  • Omega 3- Fatty Acids
  • SAM-e

Heart (the most vital organ in our body)

Digestive (diet pills are a NO; to maintain a healthy weight making sure you are on track with digestion is the healthiest and most effective long-term)

  • Multivitamin
  • Prebiotics
  • Probiotics
  • Vitamin D

Immune (An apple a day keeps the DR away)

  • Echinacea
  • Multivitamins
  • Vitamin C
  • Vitamin E
  • Zinc

Most of these vitamins are familiar to you but any that you are unsure of (beauty especially) do research. Find what brand works for you! Take it even a step further. If you have a local nutrition store; go browse and ask the store clerks for their opinion.

KEEP CALM & STAY HEALTHY!

XO,

The Ultimate Betties

Is she really a whale?

Ok, we have to get this off our chests because honestly it’s ridic.

Leave Kim Kardashian’s maternity style and her weight gain alone, for two different reasons:

1. She’s pregnant people, she’s going to gain weight. Shit happens. Yeah, maybe she doesn’t portray it entirely well, but she’s doing her own thing and we respect her for that.

2. There is SO much going on in the world than what she’s wearing today and how many rolls shes developed since Kanye’s seed has been implanted.

Bad choice.

Bad choice.

We admit some of her choices are not the best but why should we give a flying rat’s ass? If any of you are ever pregnant and in the spotlight constantly, then you may complain. Other than that, move on. Read a book, do something productive with your life.

Over it.

Xo,

The Ultimate Betties

What did we learn this week?

Trust is defined as a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability or strength of someone or something. It’s been said that trust in any relationship is one of the most important aspects. Without it, your relationship is nothing.

This week we learned that broken trust truly is the hardest thing to rebuild. Where do you begin? How do you move forward? and the hardest question still remains; Can you really ever trust someone again after they have betrayed you?

After reading many articles and racking our brain trying to come up with answers, we realized something, Betties. You can read 100 books, articles, and interviews about this topic, but one thing is certain. Unless you can get over whatever betrayal took place, you will never fully trust a person again.  You have to start by letting go. Forgive but never forget.

It’s Friday. A new week is upon us. We challenge you to try to let go of any loose ends that may be causing conflict in your relationship. Whether it be you or the other person who caused the issue. Life is too short to hold on to grudges. If you feel that a person should stay in your life for any reason; act on it. Move forward. Work together as a team and reach your goal.

Have a safe weekend!

Xo,

The Ultimate Betties

 

Keep Calm & Be Polite

Time to vent Betties! This one goes out to all of those who put up with their Bob’s buddies. If Bob has a solid crew: pat yourself on the back, open a new tab, and go browse Victoria’s Secret swim line.

We will guesstimate that nine out ten readers have this so-called “buddy” in his boxers on their couch. Okay! Maybe that’s a bit dramatic. How are you supposed to act when you and Bob’s best friend don’t get along? Here’s how:

1. Spend time apart. (You should be doing this anyways — it’s healthy) this way he can spend time with the guys and doesn’t feel stuck choosing one relationship over the other.
2. Don’t discuss this person. It’s not a bad thing to not discuss someone who might later create drama.
3. BE CORDIAL! Say hello and goodbye. Truthfully, you don’t need to say much more. It’s impolite not to acknowledge a person entering or exiting a room.

There’s always the fourth and most ideal option: get to know them. Maybe you two are similar? Maybe there’s something about this person that would change your opinion of them? Either way, outside opinions shouldn’t dictate your relationship status. Take what people say with a grain of salt. Trust those who try to help dim your ‘love blinders’ in certain situations. Otherwise, follow your heart and try to maintain your betty-like demeanor through the drama.

For relationship advice, pointers, or just a listening ear –
email us theultimatebetty@gmail.com subject line: Dear Betty

Xoxo,
The Ultimate Betties

The Power of Positive Thought

We, we’re into the New Year and our resolutions have faded or are fading fast, so what’s new? You look around and see the evidence of your failure in the empty, discarded fast food bag or bags on the floor of your car. It goes that way, so much for getting in shape with that new gym membership.

It’s not too late to revise and revisit your resolution and save it from the dust heap. How do I do that you ask? Actually it’s quite simple, first put down that TV remote and listen. Resolutions are promises we fool ourselves into making with the transition into the New Year. Like any promise, they can and are be easily broken or waved off. The success rate for changing comfortable behaviors with a spoken promise is quite low.

​As an Ultimate Bob, we want to maximize each day and each opportunity which we come across in our daily travels. Rather than make a promise, let’s each take a breath and envision a new way to change our lives or at least our behaviors. Instead of saying, I’m going to the gym to work out, ride the Lifecycle and get in shape, look forward and see what you will look like and feel after several months of discipline. See the change you want to become. Envision yourself with a smaller waistline, bigger biceps and more prominent triceps.

Close your eyes and see you running each morning, visualize yourself with a slimmer sculpted waistline, in better shape enjoying a more robust energy level and feeling better about yourself. The key is to visualize what it is you want to become.

The constant visualization will not just motivate you; it will reinforce that which you wish to become. The power of your will is far greater than you realize. Trust yourself in that vision, close your eyes and dare to dream the new You into being.

Peace,

The Ultimate Bob

 

Mantras

Betties, do you know what a mantra is and how awesome they are!? Let us take a look, because even we were surprised at how useful they are in our lives.

“A sacred verbal formula repeated in prayer, meditation, or incantation … ” Otherwise, a commonly used word or phrase originating from the Hindu culture.

buddha_with_navkar_mantra

In books like Keys To Success by Napoleon Hill (which we highly recommend reading), he reiterates how important repeating words and phrases are because that’s how you learn. Like the title suggests, being successful means trying things in a different approach.

Here’s a mantra about a mantra: “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” ~ Aristotle .. think about it. Whether it’s a good habit or a bad habit we are bound to continue it unless we learn to break the cycle.

One of the most useful mantras is telling yourself to smile. Just think the word “smile” and it is almost automatic that a smile will develop on your lovely face:)

XO,

The Ultimate Betties

What Did You Learn This Week?

What Did You Learn This Week: Health in America

This week, we did not learn something of positivity but rather negativity. However, it was something we would like to share with everyone.

usatoday

We read this article on USA Today’s website: “Americans live sicker, die younger than Others.” When we read through it we were particularly surprised considering how many resources the U.S. has and have developed over the years.
“Americans consume more calories per person; are more likely to abuse drugs; less likely to wear seat belts, more likely to be in a traffic accident; and are more likely to use a firearm in acts of violence…Well-educated Americans — with medical insurance and healthy habits, such as avoiding tobacco and obesity — are still sicker than their peers abroad.” That’s scary.

We will let you read the article at your leisure. This really opened up our eyes to something we didn’t realize was going on and we hope it will do the same for you all.

As Betties it is part of our duty to help. Plus, we want all of you and our friends and family around for as long as possible! Start taking a look at how you’re living and the people around you. Help them, suggest to them how to live a little better. It may not all be just about exercise(though it does have a lot of benefits) it could be more simple than that. Help someone quit smoking, be their therapist and let’s not forget to teach our children the same things. Studies show the first 5 years of a child’s life are the most influential.

How can you help?

XO,

The Ultimate Betties

Booty Blasters

If you are like us, you have spent hours on different sites trying to find the PERFECT booty exercises. There are so many DVD‘s on the market such as Brazilian Butt Lift, Your Best Butt Fast, and Exhale: Core Fusion – Thighs & Glutes. The downside to DVD’s are how pricey they are. If you already have a gym membership, adding on those additional prices isn’t logical.

Thanks to Fitness Magazine; we found an amazing Seven Day Treadmill routine that blasts 2,000 calories and targets areas such as your glutes and thighs.

We also found 9 ways to sculpt your buns at home! Check it out here.

Remember: The most effective way to get a bootylicious backside is to stick with it! These are the workouts we have personally used and have found them VERY effective.

XO,

The Ultimate Betties

Weekly Inspiration: Half Full

Is your cup half full or half empty?

Well, from this Betty’s point-of-view growing up it was always half empty. Not because I had a bad childhood at all, but because that’s just the way the cookie crumbled, no blame on anyone. Nowadays, its more three-quarters-full! It was wasn’t an easy ride though.

I’ve learned that the people you surround yourself with help keep your state of mind. If you’re hanging out with someone who is a Negative Nancy then how do you suppose you can be a positive person? Now, I’m not recommending that you drop all of your friends, but no one enjoys being negative, no one. Maybe you and your friend can work on being positive together!

Personally, for example, I used to have a problem with my weight during those wonderful awkward years. I couldn’t run a half a mile without stopping. It was very embarrassing during gym class in elementary/middle school. It wasn’t until high school that I put my mind to getting in shape and finally being able to run that mile.

My parents were “gym rats” and when they said they would pay for a gym membership for me by my high school, I halfheartedly accepted. At first I wasn’t ready, but by sophomore year I was getting up for school packing my own lunch, and a bag for the gym. After school everyday I walked to the gym and remained there for a solid 2 hours(a little excessive), but I loved it! After a few months, I was running for 20 minutes solid, which was way more than a mile and I was dropping weight, 20 pounds in total. I felt so good about myself. I did what I thought I couldn’t do and that was the moment my life started to take a positive turn!

Next time something doesn’t go your way or you think that you can’t: your boss wont let you have that day off, your plane is delayed, lose that extra 5 pounds, etc. I want you to take a step back and come up with three possible situations that could be worse and let it roll off your back.

When things get rough Betties, don’t get down, just think of all the positives. Are you breathing? Can you walk and talk? Do you have a family and friends? Yes! Then consider yourself lucky. We take those people and allowances for granted sometimes and every now and then we need to be reminded of that.

How you portray yourself is how people will read you, remember that!
Keep that glass FULL!

XO,

The East Coast Betty

Start Now, Stay Healthy!

Alright Betties..it’s time for our opinions on the world of exercise. Did you just shiver when you read that word? You’re probably not alone, however, we are here to give you some ideas along with a bit of Betty advice.

Whether you are skinny, slim, athletic or pleasantly plump, it’s time to get off of your butt and hit the machines or the routines. Not necessarily to look like a Victoria’s Secret Model, more to live a healthy life. The older you get the harder it will be to get started exercising, along with our metabolisms slowing down, it’s no fun to even think about. But if you can add in a little exercise along with a healthy “food lifestyle” (never use the “D” word, if never works) you will feel 10x better than you do at this very moment!

  • “The reason I exercise is for the quality of life I enjoy.” –Kenneth H. Cooper

We once read something and it has stuck with us; if you don’t have time to do a full workout do push-ups. Push-ups work out way more of your body than you realize. It’s a great way to keep your core solid and your arms strong even on your busiest of days.

Everything you need to know about eating right and exercising can be found on the internet. If you have a Pinterest, you already know you can find almost any exercise routine known to man. Here’s the great thing about finding little routines on the site: you can do the exercises in the privacy of your own home. We understand if you’re not pro-gym, a lot of people have gym anxiety. We have pinned a lot of exercise routines we enjoy doing (or are planning on getting to someday) when we don’t have a lot of time or we don’t feel like hitting the gym. This picture is an example of something we found that we think is perfect, especially for the newest of workout goers.

Pick out 5 each day for a weeks worth of exercising, so you work different muscle groups each day. At the end of the week, put them all back in for the next week.

Simple right? We have even found fun routines to do in correlation with a movie:

Try This: Out of Bed Workout – repeat this cycle 2x right when you wake up in the morning: 50 jumping jacks, 5 pushups, 20 sit ups, 20 mountain climbers, 30 second plank. Works your whole body before your brain knows what it’s doing.

Also, please do not be afraid to go to the gym, people are not going to snicker at you for trying, remember that.

We’re not here to preach, just trying to get your mind and body moving. It’s proven that just a little exercise a day will make your days better, keep your mind clearer and help you sleep better at night, we could all benefit from that!

Stay healthy,

The Ultimate Betties xo
*Do you have any fun exercise ideas you would like to share with us!? Email us or comment below.

An Apple A Day…

Keeps The Doctor Away!

OK, so we have all heard of Apple Cider Vinegar and how many amazing things it does for our bodies. Most information on the internet (like the picture below) just show you what it can be used for and not how to use it correctly. These Betties thought it would be beneficial to not only share how often you are supposed to use the stuff but also the pros and cons. We need to inform you though, it has just been brought to our attention during the research: DO NOT take this stuff straight. It should always be mixed with water or whatever beverage you prefer.

Opinions are opinions and everybody has a right to an educated guess, a hypothesis if you will. The internet has both positive and negative views and thought on apple cider vinegar. Some say it is a natural cure-all, some say otherwise. Before we list the wonderful things that people have proposed that it does, we will list the negatives. Don’t worry the list is short: it’s very acidic, which is true but that’s why it has to be mixed with something else.
Image
Dosage: about 2 teaspoons worth a day, usually mixed with water or juice. There is no definite limitation on how much you can have per day but lets stay smart and only take it once or twice at most, daily. If trying to get rid of fungus, it’s safe to say to diluting is necessary.

This company called Bragg Live Foods produces natural apple cider vinegar that is different from the distilled kind that you would normally get in the grocery store. The natural ACV is made from fresh, crushed, organically grown apples that are allowed to mature in wooden barrels, which helps the fermentation process.

According to Bragg Live Foods; “Following the old cliché, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away,” apples are one of the oldest, most nutritious foods on earth. They are rich in potassium, a mineral many of us are deficient in, and a deficiency that causes old age to creep upon us sooner. Calcium maintains our hard tissues such as bones, and potassium is the equivalent to the body’s soft tissues, keeping the body’s flesh and arteries soft and resilient. Fresh, organic apples are used to make Apple Cider Vinegar, which contains necessary ingredients, such as enzymes, and life-stimulating minerals, mainly potassium, in a natural state. Besides being a natural stimulant for vitality, Apple Cider Vinegar cleanses and restores nutrients to the body so that the body can heal itself.

APPLE CIDER VINEGAR: Helps Remove Body Toxins * Helps Promote a Youthful Body *Helps support a healthy immune system * Helps Maintain Healthy Skin * Helps Control Weight * Improves Digestion and Assimilation * Soothes Tight and Aching Joints and Sore Muscles from exercise * Soothes irritated skin.”

What we have gathered is that this stuff is not absolutely proven true..yet. Scientists are still testing it. BUT, as for these Betties, we think that this stuff is so great and beneficial that the world just doesn’t want us to know that there is something out there like this. Why would we pay money for any and every kind of vitamin and mineral or anti whatever to help make us feel better when all we would need is a $2.00 bottle of vinegar?..exactly! Pick it up or find the natural ACV through the link above.
Stay Healthy!

Xo,

The Ultimate Betties

Natural Ingredients used in Skincare, Hair Care, & Body Care.

Have you ever gone to a drugstore to pick up some skin care products and actually read the ingredients that are put into these products? If you have read them, do you understand at all what they are? I will say that 98% of us don’t. Why do we need to know? We’ve seen the commercials, magazine ads, and our favorite Hollywood star is their spokeswoman. We automatically trust that their product will benefit us. Most of the in these products are used in more natural products as well, but the levels and mixture that you are buying at the store actually dehydrates our skin more.

If you have ever noticed that a creame or mask, actually leaves your face feeling dry, extra oily, or irritated, that’s why.

We’re going to share with you 20 natural ingredients and the benefits they have for your skin, hair, and body treatments. Most of you will be shocked.

Almond Meal: Soothing and Exfoliating. Used in body and face scrubs.

Avocado: A valuable source of protein and Vitamins A, B, & C. It’s moisturizing, soothing, and healing. It’s emollient properties make Avocado a popular facial and hair care ingredient.

Apple Extract: Also known as Malic Acid, it’s one of the alpha hydroxy acids. It’s antiseptic, exfoliating, and stimulating. This is most commonly used in acne=fighting and rejuvenating skin care preparations.

Basil: A very potent ingredient that must be used in small doses. It’s stimulating and antiseptic. It’s used in facial treatments to purify the skin.

Black Walnut: High in Tannin & Iodine. This ingredient is antiseptic, antimicrobial and astrigent. this can be used to treat viral or bacterial conditions such as acne.

Cayenne: It’s analgesic, anti-inflammatory and stimulating properties make this ingredient perfect for massage cremes to help sooth achy muscles.

Carrot: An anti-oxidant; it moisturizes and soothes. Most commonly used in facial cremes and moisturizing masks.

Clove: The dried flower buds of the Clove Tree are the parts of the plant that are most commonly used in esthetics. Antiseptic; analgesic, stimulating. This is used to treat acne and other skin conditions.

Dill: Soothing and analgesic. Used in skin care preparations to treat irritated skin. It can also be incorporated into massages to ease sore muscles.

Fig: The Fig Fruit is high in moisturizing properties but the tree’s bark is highly astringent and can be used in facial toners.

Grape Seed Extract: Taken from the seeds of grapes it’s an antioxidant which promotes healing and moisturizing. This particular ingredient has become very popular in anti-aging preparations.

Hops: Hops is used in brewing to prevent bacterial action. It has astringent properties and can be very soothing. This is used in skin care, body care, and hair care preparations.

Horseradish: Stimulating; antioxidant, diuretic, and antiseptic. This can be incorporated into body treatments to promote circulation and treat water retention.

Hibiscus: Stimulating and healing. Most commonly used in hair care preparations, especially formulas to treat hair loss. Also, used in rejuvenating masks and facial cremes.

Mint: Stimulating and antiseptic. Used in skin care, hair care, body care, and can be incorporated into body treatments to boost circulation in the skin.

Papaya: Contains Papain, a power plant exfoliant. Softening; exfoliating, soothing, and moisturizing this is incorporated into facial and body exfoliants.

Pineapple: The pineapple is rich in bromelain, an anti-inflammatory, protein-digesting enzyme. It  also contains iron, phosphoric, and sulphuric acids, magnesia and potassium and sodium salts. Stimulating, exfoliating, antiseptic, anti-inflammatory. Commonly used in exfoliants and in blemish-fighting preparations.

Oregano: Used as a medicinal plant by the early New England settlers. Oregano is antiseptic, antimicrobial, healing, and stimulating. Used in skincare and body preparations. It’s also used in body therapies to ease sore muscles.

Sandalwood: is a delicately scented evergreen native to India. Soothing and antiseptic. Used to relieve itching, acne, and other skin irritations.

Sugarcane: glycollic acid, one of the most popular of the alpha hydroxy acids, is derived from sugarcane. Exfoliating and healing this is used in anti-aging skin care and body preparations.

As we get older, us Betties need to make sure we take care of our skin. We want to remain youthful and healthy. That’s why we highly suggest you research the ingredients in products before you purchase them. What we use today affects us tomorrow. If these natural ingredients intrigued you and you want to know, “where can I get products that promote these”?

We have it for you!! Check out Hylunia – Amazing product line!

Hope this was informative for you all. If you have any questions, feel free to comment, and we will answer in a timely manner!

xo,

The Ultimate Betties